Holding Pattern

Usually long pauses in my writing create a space where it is kind of hard to return to the blogging. Not because the act of writing is difficult but because so many little things happen in the time between it becomes a challenge to determine how to express it all without writing a million words. Anxiety builds as time passes with an underling knowledge that the smaller things that might get noted in more frequent postings will be "lost" or forgotten, which can create an undercurrent (Reasonable or not) of despair/mourning at having not captured those moments. While it has been a longer pause in my posts than Id like generally like, and even while the time in between included some major holidays, my anxiety over sitting down to write this is fairly minute. Why? Because, although the time was filled with enough activity and whatnot to keep me from the keyboard, it was also a time during which it seemed like no progress/movement was being made in any arena. like an airplane stuck in a circling pattern... you know you are getting there eventually but you can't do anything else but sit and wait. And, until wheels down, what is there really to report about .. other than any unexpected passenger antics. Like my mother Christmas phone conversation with us.

When the family sat down to make our Christmas call to Mom, she was home alone waiting for Dan and Grandpa to arrive. So we had a nice little visit with hello and quick updates all around and then mom starts on a n unexpected tangent given the company. "Hey Vicci! That is such a SEXY BRA you showed me. OH MY GOD!" Connors face read "What the Heck" as his eyes widened in surprise and cheeks flushed in embarrassment as she continued to discuss her bosom and why such a bra would not fit her. We all had a good laugh afterwards.. although I'm sure Connor is probably still a little shook up over hearing such things. Much in the way I am when she once ventured into the joys of the magic finger vibrating glove with Dan Greg and I. Wait... What? omg Mom! I do declare, it is wonderful to have her as a travel companion.

Speaking of companions... Misty, the cat: We did a little research and determined that she is a pixiebob breed. What does that mean? Her character and design (Although genetics don't necessarily bear this truth) are in keeping with a bob cats. She is quite active during the day. She is extremely companionable and is almost always near us. She doesn't like to be touched so much and she will never be a lap cat but she wants to be recognized as being a part of the conversation. If she wants your attention, she will sit at your feet. If you dont recognize her she will meow twice. If your ignore that, she will gently bat at your leg once ..then twice.. then she will wrap her arms around your calf so you can't ignore her anymore. There are no claws involved at all. In the morning when I greet her, I will reach down and scratch her head or she will climb right up my arm and perch on my shoulder for a minute. She is as intelligent as can be. From the start I noted her watching how we open doors and in design made sure that any lever knobs were not easily accessible to her and then I forgot about it. We have started to let her roam a little now that she is fixed and her hormones have evened out. The second time we let her out... she let herself back in with the assistance of a table next to such a lever knob operated door. From uncertain (and hormonal un-spade) beginnings, its nice to have developed a comfortable companionable understanding of her nature. She reminds me once again of the huge role hormones play in personality.

Connor has had a number of changes happening in his world. Due to difficulties with co-workers, he started looking for another job and lined up a position with a local grocery store. He had planned on quitting the one job but ended up staying on and changing departments. He now works part time in the back unloading trucks and tagging merch. He is quite content there now. And he started his other part time job in the Produce Dept on Jan 2. He is determining how much he likes it. The environments are very different and it will be interesting to see what he does when school starts up again ... which I think might actually be next week. Next up he will be buying a car. How that goes will be a story for probably the next blog.

Willow... Willow... Willow... *Exhale* Willow started having very noticeable seizure type events at the beginning of December. Following the first one(s), she went into the dr.s office with the intention of asking to see a cardiologist. Her leg had gone numb and a few other things screamed at me that this was a heart issue. There is a long history in the family of major heart issues and her history backs up the possibility. Because she is an "adult" she can choose to go in without me. When she came out she didn't have any referrals and the dr. had basically dismissed it as a panic attack or anxiety. Which it sure as shit wasn't and the next day she is incapable of getting out of be. So I go to the Drs office and tell them that "I need to advocate for my daughter and make an appt to talk to the dr." They set up a time for a little later that day. When the nurse took me back and stopped at the scale, and I again said "Im mom, and I am here to advocate on her behalf." you could see her panic. Her eyes got wider when I handed her the release Willow signed giving me permission to talk about her health. She asked me to wait and she walked into the nurses station and then they all panicked. How can we bill this? Get Willow on the phone and confirm we have her permission! Scramble, scramble. Eventually I sat down with a dr. (Hers was not in the office that day) I talked. He typed everything for her Dr. That night another seizure happens and Max and I take her to the ER. They generally want to dismiss it as an anxiety event but they are willing to put in referrals to Neurology and Cardiology. Cardiology was quick to set up an appointment but it was a month out. Neurology took almost a month to get an appointment lined up but they got us in within the week once we were able to schedule. A referral was required from her Primary care dr which was created but accidently not sent. It was also during the holidays and drs. take time off like anyone. So there was frustration waiting, but a week after our trip to the ER and heart monitor arrived in the mail. We thought it was related to the hospital visit but it was actually her PCP reacting to my visit. (Note to self: Send a thank you) It turned out that the Cardiologist appointment that we had scheduled was to get her in a monitor. Receiving the one in the mail in such a timely manner helped give a sense of hope of getting all this figured out. It helped slightly ease an already stressful time with Max being gone for the holidays and her being scared and basically bed ridden. Slowly she has made progress in getting back on her feet. Her appointment with the neurologist was yesterday. She had an EEG. Electrodes were attached to her head and her brain activity was monitored while she answered questions, watched strobe lights or attempted to sleep. We will hear the results soon. What is interesting to note is that she had little mini seizures with the strobing. Also interesting to note that Disassociation is a hallmark of epilepsy and which has been one of the hallmarks of Willow. She takes the heart monitor off tomorrow and mails it in for assessment. We should hear back from her Dr. next week on what the results say and what direction to take from there.

In the meantime, Willow is not letting any of this keep her down. She had a job interview on Wednesday and stayed a few hours to work. She is now full time at a new restaurant that opened up. She's putting her culinary training to use now that knives no longer pose a threat and she is making a decent wage for it. She has also started the enrolment process to return to school. That's my girl!

My search for a job has been a bit more challenging than Willows. From Scam artists and no reply's to interviews with overly exuberant employers or calls ambitious foreign accented recruiters who dug up my contact info off of Monster.com. As it stands at the moment, I have submitted a resume to a company that utilizes an app coupled with a health coach for those dealing with Auto-Immune issues. I saw them online and submitted my resume directly via the website last week. I have not heard anything and so am also perusing something a little different as a yard care equipment phone tech. This position is through a temp to hire position and training will be at the end of February. While it is not nearly as soon as Id like, that give me enough time to get some personal appointments out of the way, attend to the next steps with willow, and dig into and wrap up taxes. Which will make transitioning back into the workforce a little less overwhelming. We will see what happens but it is a relief to know that the tech position is on the back burner.

In other household news, we are expecting some special company! Our friends from Germany are planning a trip in July. I also realize that some before and after shots of the door and window replacement work would be good to share. So here are three before shots showing the original wood installation and how it was rotting away

And here we have the new window and door. I realized after taking the one of window just how badly my board needed some love, so I set about stripping off the wax and wear of the Pacific and cleaned her up real nice.

Well that about wraps up the news for now. but before I go one last story that is just something else. I knew this lady back around 2012ish. She was a friend of the neighbors who we would see on occasion when they would have little house parties. She was good at partying. I don't know that she was good at much of anything else other than being superficial. Anyway, this group of people got added to my various social media sites and then basically forgotten in the years that have passed from our leaving the area. About a month or so ago, this lady popped up on my LinkedIn page and she liked my post about being scammed. It was unexpected but okay, But then she turned around and asked me if Id give her a direct referral to my bosses at the Health company that was used in the scam. :/ I told her that it looks like a great place to work if the job was legit and that Id be happy to give her a personal referral if she needed it. To which she reinforced that she wanted me to talk to my bosses for her. I told her that I had not worked there, my offer was a scam and I had written all about it in a post, the one she liked, and then I re-provided the link to the post. I don't expect I will be hearing from her again.